While attending a wedding reception recently a college student asked me, “If you could go back to the age of 18, start your adult life over, would you change anything?” My response was, “Yes, absolutely!” She was so startled at my response I thought her eyes were going to pop out of her head. So I went on to explain, “I would do everything differently just because I could; just to have different experiences and to see if I would end up in the same place.” You see, I am completely happy with my life the way it is right now. I believe that you are as happy as you choose to be in any given moment. What aggravates me most in life is having to make decisions and choose between several good options. The mystery of “what if” always haunts me. In any given day, I make decisions knowing that if I make the opposite choice, something just as good will happen to me. As a result, I want to try all options and see which I like best, but that is just not possible. It would be like trying to study math, English and science for one hour, all during the same hour – not possible.
The most important research you could do at this point in your life is to find out what is important to you. How do you want to live? How much money do you need? How can you make that much money doing a job that you enjoy? The best way to answer those questions is to take advantage of as many opportunities as possible. Truly challenge yourself intellectually. Before you know it, your college days will be gone and you will be propelled into a world that you have created for yourself either consciously and thoughtfully, or simply by default.
What do I mean by “default?” You graduate with a degree, get a job in that field, only to find out that lifestyle is not “you.” Start deciding now how you really want to live and be serious about it – this is your life we’re talking about. Do you have an interest in something outside of your current major? Fine. Take one class in that subject next semester. You will find out one of three things: 1) You hate that subject and don’t know what you were thinking; 2) its okay, maybe a hobby for later in life, or 3) you’re really interested in this and want to pursue it further.
Knowing is always better than wondering. If you had the opportunity to take every possible choice just to see how it turns out, wouldn’t you? I definitely would. But we can’t – it’s just not possible. So set yourself up to be happy by realizing that choices are just that – choices. Options given to you by fate and for all you know, they all lead to exactly the same place.
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This post was written by Debra Moorhead, Motivational Speaker, Author, and Coach on September 9, 2006
