I’ve been in orthodontic treatment since April 2004.  Until today.  Today, I took control of my oral situation.

In the fall of 2003 my husband, who is a Dentist for those of you who may not know, began providing Invisalign® treatment.  I had one, (1), lower tooth slightly misaligned and I asked if that form of treatment would work for me.

Obviously, the answer was, “No.”

To keep this story short and not bore you to tears, (and so that I can get to my point), let me give you the timeline.  In April of 2002 I began wearing lingual braces.  They came off in May of 2004.  They were off for one year, and then went back on in May of 2005 because my orthodontist was not pleased with the result.  “I can get a better result,” he said.  After much nagging from me, he took them off, prematurely according to my husband, in May of this year.

At my last retainer check, he made an adjustment for a tooth that wasn’t positioned properly, which caused other teeth to move and now, you guessed it, he wants to go back in again.

I’m not going back.

I’m taking over my treatment and taking back over my life.

Here’s why.

When he told me today that there was no way to fix the situation except to bond, I became very depressed.  “I’ve heard this before,” I thought.  How can something that wasn’t correctable in five years get fixed in six weeks?  (That was his estimate, but again, I’ve heard that before.)

I have a lot getting ready to happen in my life right now.  Lots of opportunities.  I cannot afford to become depressed.  So, I thought, “What would make me not so depressed?”

Then I remembered a passage from an Abraham-Hicks recording saying, “Do not focus on that which you do not want.  Focus on what you do want.”  (I’m probably paraphrasing, but using quotation marks, just in case!  Please forgive.)

Okay, so what do I want?  A beautiful smile.  Wait a minute, I have a beautiful smile.

And that’s when it hit me.

The people who were happy with my smile before 2004, namely me, are happy with my smile today.  The people who were unhappy with my smile before 2004, namely just my husband and my orthodontist, are the only ones unhappy with my smile today.  So, it seems to me that those who focus on frustration will continue to experience frustration.

Now, I understand they mean well.  I really do.  But here’s my point:  I could be in orthodontic treatment from now until kingdom come and those two would never, will never, be happy with the alignment of my teeth. Why?  Well, that seems to be their focus.

I am happy.  That one little misaligned tooth is perfect!  I have a lower retainer to keep it in check.  The upper arch was beautiful before, and is beautiful now.  Those who focus on beautiful things continue to bring beautiful things into their experience.  It seems wise to me to focus on beautiful things.

While I am a firm believer in the power of a smile, and don’t get me wrong – you should have ortho treatment if you need it and want it – if something does not interfere with your attainment of joy, it is not worth correcting.  Is it?  Doesn’t it make more sense to “work on” those things that would bring us joy, peace, love, happiness, and harmony?

While I truly appreciate the treatment I received from this delightful man, I know from my inner being that he will never be satisfied.  It’s his issue.  It’s only mine, if I choose to bring it into my experience.

Today, I choose not that experience.

This encounter today gave me such a real-world example of co-creating.  It’s imperative to remember that we always have a choice, and that we must choose joy.  To determine the best decision, we only need to listen to our inner being.  When I began treatment in 2002, I felt it was right for me and that good things would come from it. They did, indeed.  In 2005, I knew I was making a bad decision, the emotion was very strong, but I wanted to please these other people.  I realized today, and I mean, I learned this lesson real good:  You cannot create someone else’s joy.

Now, here’s my challenge to you:  What are you doing, going along with, tolerating, putting up with, or giving thought to, in an attempt to make someone else happy?  And more importantly, is it working?

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