I had so many wonderful comments and questions come across my e-mail while writing my previous blog series on the book “The Science of Getting Rich,” by Wallace D. Wattles. (Copyright 1999 Rebecca Fine.)

One particular reader had questions that truly vibrated with me since I have been in those shoes, so to speak, not so long ago.  I remember that he had a lot of good questions that I wanted to come back and spend more time on with everyone after I finished the series, so today, while reviewing my responses to him, I decided to share his dilemma, since many of us find ourselves struggling with these issues, and share my responses.

His e-mail, excerpted where I see fit, was as follows:

Hi Debra:

Thank you for your site and your hard work. My wife and I are big fans of your blog and TSOGR. I am at a crossroads and would love to hear your opinion about the following:

IMO, [In my opinion] negative feelings are manifested when your expectations do not match your reality. For example, you thought you did well on a test you studied hard for yet you received a poor grade or you thought you’d get a raise at work and you didn’t, things you “thought” were not realized, your expectations were not met.

I have been working very hard on the principles of The Science of Getting Rich, positive thinking, the law of attraction, etc. but my subconscious mind is acting as a very strong opposing force that reminds me and enforces the “truth” of my current situation now - the reality of where I am and the wide chasm of where I want to be (my ideal - as a father, husband, businessman, etc). By constantly focusing and concentrating on a huge vision which encompasses my desires, dreams, goals & ideals am I not just setting myself up for more negative feelings if my expectations are not met? Am I getting caught up in a vicious cycle of failure and disappointment because I am not manifesting what I want as quickly as I want it?

Thanks for your insight. I look forward to your comments.

My heart sank when I read this e-mail because the very last thing I would ever want any of you to do is stop dreaming, visualizing, and expecting.  At the same time, I could relate to where he was coming from.  I’ve been there, and I think most of us have been at some point in our lives.

I decided to “tear” his e-mail apart and show him where I felt his own thoughts and beliefs were actually holding him back.  I e-mailed him ahead of time to let him know I was going to do this and to give him time to prepare.

Here is, for the most part, how I responded.  I have taken out a few comments that were to him directly, but then expounded upon some thoughts after time for reflection.

“IMO, negative feelings are manifested when your expectations do not match your reality.”

Negative feelings do not manifest themselves, nothing does.  YOU manifest everything in your life.  The good, the bad, the indifferent; it’s all YOU.  On a deeper level, you already know this, because you started out with “in my opinion.”  What you really mean, is that it is your BELIEF that when your reality does not match your expectations, you are going to feel negative. Your belief makes it true. To become a vibrational match with what you are trying to attract into your life, you must feel positive about it.  Therefore, negative feelings are a sign that you need to change your beliefs.  Let’s work on that.

“For example, you thought you did well on a test you studied hard for yet you received a poor grade”

Did you study properly, or did you halfway study wishing and hoping that the law of attraction would kick in for you and you would get an A?  Why did you receive a poor grade – really?  I can remember many times in college when I thought I studied hard but didn’t receive the grade I wanted.  I also remember trying to take shortcuts and doing a lot of “wishin’ and hopin’” that the test wouldn’t be as difficult as the professor had warned.  Once it was over and the opportunity had passed, I had no choice but to admit to myself that I really didn’t study as hard as I could have, or I didn’t study as efficiently as I could have.  If I had paid attention to what the instructor said was going to be on the test and studied for that, instead of studying in my usual way, I would have performed much better.  When you truly do well on a test, you know it – you don’t just think it.

“or you thought you’d get a raise at work and you didn’t”

What made you think you would get the raise?  Have you truly worked for it through inspired action, or, again, were you wishin’ and hopin’?

“things you “thought” were not realized, your expectations were not met.”

I titled this post “Great Expectations” because this is where so many of us get hung up.  We learn about the law of attraction, and then we start “wishing upon a star” that all our dreams will come true.  We set high expectations for ourselves and for the universe, and then get disappointed because nothing is manifesting.  Here’s the thing:  As long as you hold “expectations,” expectations are all you will ever have.  You must turn those expectations into beliefs, and then do the work necessary, as you’re given divine guidance, to turn your dreams into reality.

I guess it comes down to your definition of “expectation.”  If you truly expect something to happen because you’re working toward its accomplishment, it will manifest, in its proper time.  If you are expecting something to happen because the universe is going to magically make things happen for you, you’re going to have a lot of expectations, for a very long time.  Let me give you a more specific example.

My husband and I want a new house.  We’ve been working for the past two years to get our finances to a place where we can have it.  We were just commenting last night on how far my business has come in the past year.  Our house is on the verge of manifesting because I can feel it.  I know it, I trust it, I fully expect it because there is no reason why I can’t have it. I am focused on having a new house, and the universe is putting things into place so that I can have it exactly the way I want it.   I believe this.  But, if all I did was expect a new house to come to me, through my own hard work and determination or through sitting on the couch visualizing, it would not happen.  In fact, that’s pretty much all I did for a number of years and that’s exactly what I got.  I wanted a new house, I longed for it, and thought that if I worked hard and saved my money, the house would come.  It didn’t.  I finally realized that I had to work with the purpose in mind of creating the circumstances for a new house.  I have to add value to the universe.  I have to do what I am inspired to do.  And I must believe that my expectation will be met.  I can’t just hope my expectation will be met.  You have to be honest with yourself here and determine, “Am I expecting with belief, or am I expecting with ‘gee I really hope this stuff works?’”  The first will get you what you want, the other will perpetuate your desire.

Do you have great expectations? Or do you have beliefs?

Random thoughts do not have power.  Think about it for a moment.  If all of our random thoughts and expectations came true instantly, we’d be living in a very confusing world.  Remember the scene in The Secret where the guy sees a postcard of an elephant and an elephant suddenly appears in his living room?  Imagine if all “the things you ‘thought’” were realized.  Really stop and think about that for a minute.  Have you ever had road rage?  See where I’m going with that?

The types of “thoughts” that manifest are the ones with power.  Powerful thoughts are thoughts that:

• Have a great deal of emotion behind them – positive or negative.
• Are focused, and definite, with a set purpose – usually positive.
• Have inspired action behind them – always positive.

The more positive your thoughts are, the more power they have, but negative thoughts can be manifested also if they have a great deal of emotion behind them.  That’s what we mean when we say that the law of attraction is working all the time, whether you know it or not, and whether you believe it or not.  If you focus on something negative with enough emotion, even saying that you don’t want it, it will manifest in your life.  That’s why we tell you to never worry.  When you find yourself worrying about something, take action.  Do what you can to prevent it, turn it over to the universe, then hold a positive belief about it.

So what does this have to do with expectations?  I’m about to wrap that up.  If negative thoughts are manifested, and positive thoughts are manifested, what happens to neutral thoughts?  They remain neutral.  This is where many of our “expectations” fall.  Then we wonder why they are not manifesting.  They are not manifesting, because you haven’t put emotion, focus, purpose, and inspired action behind them.  Once you start, your desires start their journey toward you, and you will know it.  You believe.

I think that’s enough for today.  I will address more of the issues in this e-mail in a future post.  You might want to register so you don’t miss it.

In the meantime, what are your great expectations?

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