Mommy . . .
Mommy?
Mommy.
Mommy!
Mommmmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!
Did you know that when you listen to a child intently it causes his or her self-esteem to go up? When you listen intently to another person and it is clear that you genuinely care about what that other person is saying, his or her feeling of personal value increases. He or she feels more worthwhile and important as a human being. You can actually make your child feel terrific about himself or herself by listening in a warm, genuine, caring way to everything he or she has to say.
As someone who has taught in the public education system, I believe that your undivided attention is the best support you can give your child. Children who are given proper attention and respect at home are better behaved and more likely to excel in school. I’m not saying spoil or needlessly cater to your child; there’s a huge difference between smothering a child with attention and telling them they can do no wrong and modeling the respect you’ll want them to give to others by listening to what they have to say.
When I was teaching, I could always tell the children who were given proper attention at home, and it didn’t matter whether one parent was full-time at home, both parents worked, or a single parent was involved – the difference was whether or not that child felt cared for on a basic level. Listening says you genuinely care.
School started today where I live and either has or will be soon where you are. If you get the chance, either with your own child(ren), a niece or nephew, a friend or neighbor’s child, or this weekend at church, take a few minutes to ask them about their day, and then listen intently. Ask follow-up questions. Sure, his or her attention span will probably lapse before yours, but that’s okay. On the other hand, you might find a child who needs to talk and, if so, just listen. Don’t be patronizing and ask him about his day and then brush him off. Also try to not let distractions interrupt her tale.
Sue Atchley Ebaugh said, “The greatest gift we can give one another is rapt attention to one another’s existence.”
If you have children, spend at least 15 minutes each evening with each child individually to just listen to whatever they have to say. You might be surprised at what you hear!
Until next time,
Live Joyfully!
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Posted under Education, Leadership, Motivation, Success
This post was written by Debra Moorhead, The Decision Diva on August 20, 2008
