I’ve been a positive-thinking, law-of-attraction teaching, motivational speaker, author, and coach now for several years.  Wanna know what stumps me?  When a close friend is in a bad mood.

Coupled with the sincere desire to want to help is the knowing that there really is not much that I can do.  I can try to lead my loved one to thinking better thoughts, thoughts of relief, or trying to get his/her mind off of the problem, but you know how it is - when in you’re in that kind of mood, you’re just not interested.  I’ve found that the only thing you can really do in this situation is give your friend the space she needs to get over the issue herself, and have faith that she will.  After all, we all want to feel good, and we always find a way to survive.

So what if you’re the one down in the dumps?  Ah.  That’s where I can help.  ‘Cause if you’re willing to read this, you’re ready to improve your mood, your situation, and your life.  So let’s go.

Being in a bad mood is nothing more than the result of focusing so much on your problems that you can’t see the solutions.  The only time we’re in a bad mood is because we think we have no way out of our current situation.  We’re wallowing in our sorrow.  Wouldn’t it be nice if we could just flip a switch and our bad mood was instantly replaced with a good mood?  Well, you really can.  If you really want to do so.

The law of attraction says that “like attracts like.”  You bring about what you think about.  You are the creator of your life experience and you create through the balance of your thoughts.  When you see or experience something you do not like or that does not feel good to you, you instantly have a desire to attract something different into your experience – something that you do like and that feels good to you.

Whatever it is that you are wanting to manifest, whether it’s a million dollars, a healthy body, spiritual peace, a loving relationship, or an improved work environment, you will attract it faster if you find ways to get on a vibrational level with that desired result more frequently.  Let me explain.

This thing that you want, whatever it is, you obviously desire it because you believe that it will bring you relief.  “I want a better job because I am so sick and tired of this one.”  “I want to make more money so that my kids have the things that make them happy.”  “I want to be well so that I’m not sick anymore and burdening everyone around me.”  So the emotion driving the desire for this thing you want is relief.  Right?  Okay then, so what we need to do, is find ways of experiencing relief now, so that our vibration is in line with this thing we want. Like attracts like – relief attracts relief.

So in the interest of feeling some relief and getting your mood turned around, here is a list of simple things I like to do to feel good right now.

1. Listen to upbeat music. My favorite is Al Jarreau’s Boogie Down.  I’m a Believer by Smash Mouth gets me going too.  Practicing music, if you’re at all musically inclined, works as well.  Just be sure to keep it upbeat and positive – remember, this is supposed to raise your vibration, so no tearjerkers or anything remotely sad.  Got it?
2. Dance.  Close the office door, put on that music, and let it all hang out!  Get your groove on!  Feel silly?  That’s the point.  Just a few minutes of relief is all it takes, plus, the endorphin kick alone will boost your spirits.
3. Watch favorite TV shows. Good ones – funny ones – old ones – like the Cosby show.  There’s just something about Bill Cosby that always makes me laugh.  I love his clean, positive humor.   I especially like smart comedies.  Seinfeld is another good one.  Big Bang Theory reruns always make me laugh.  Anything that lifts your vibration will work, and if at any moment it starts to not feel so good, just turn it off – move on to something else.  I had this saying when I was on my diet:  “It’s not worth the calories.”  As in, when something didn’t taste good, I would save the calories for later to use on something that did taste good.  You can do the same with television.  There’s certainly plenty of it out there, and there are plenty of other ways to utilize your time and raise your vibration.  So don’t waste a second on anything that doesn’t feel good.  It’s not worth it.
4. Watch favorite movies. Same idea as above, except a little longer for those days when you have the time.  And if there are any parts of the movie that “bring you down,” just fast forward past that part.  After all, you already know what happens, don’t you?  I have an emergency copy of Legally Blonde in my archives.
5. Write an entry in the gratitude journal. I’ve talked about gratitude journals before and by now I’m sure everyone has heard of them.  Unless you’ve made it a daily habit, though, I thought you might need a little reminder of how well it works. Just start listing everything that you are grateful for right this moment.  If you’re having trouble with a particular person or situation, focus on that, and write everything you appreciate about that person or situation.  Keep writing until you feel better.  Trust me, this works.
6. Focus on love. It can be anyone or any thing that you love.  Not feeling so happy with your significant other right now?  That’s okay – we’ve all been there!  Write about your cat.  Or your new car, or your old car, or your pretty wall paper, or your new desk chair, or your favorite pen, or the fact that it’s Spring, or that it’s snowing outside, or . . . get the drift?  I know a person who says you can’t love something that can’t love you back.  That’s silly.  Love is an emotion and the more you feel it, the more you will bring things to love into your experience.  So love what you love and love that you love it.
7. Get out in nature. Go barefoot in the grass, sit under a tree, feed the birds, smell flowers, listen to a waterfall or waves crashing against the shore.  There’s something about nature that lifts our vibration.  I believe it’s the connection with millions of other living things that nature provides.  The vibrations offered by plants and animals in nature are so pure, so unassuming.  The tree you sit under might by hundreds of years old while the flowers have only been up a few weeks.  Most things in nature co-exist peacefully.  There’s no competition, no worry, no doubt; just the basic assumption that all is well.  Spending time with these beings of nature will help you pick up on that vibration.
8. Exercise. Walk, run, swim, jump up and down. Sometimes we just need to get our blood flowing.  Exercise of any kind, whatever you like, will energize you on all levels, including your vibrations.  If you have some sort of medical condition where exercise is impossible, do whatever you can to shake up your aura.
9. Drink something.  Eat something. Skipping meals and being hungry or dehydrated are sure ways of lowering your mood.  My personal favorites are chocolate,  and large, juicy-ripe blackberries.  What are your favorite little food gems that you know will lift your spirits?  Stock up!
10. Do something nice for someone – spread love and joy. This will get you in a good mood fast.  The other person doesn’t even have to know you did it.  When you see someone else’s mood lifted because of some action you chose to take, it will send you soaring to the joy category.  It’s okay if they know you were responsible, but it’s also okay if they don’t.  My favorite things are the unexpected, like giving the garbage man a cup of hot chocolate on a cold day.
11. Play with a pet. This is a double-whammy because not only does the play raise your vibration, but a pet will teach you how to focus.  Seriously, watch your cat or dog the next time you fidget with that string or throw that ball.  There might as well be nothing else around.  We need to focus like that when we’re creating.  Watch, learn, and lift.
12. De-clutter something. Did you really think you were going to get a list from me that didn’t include something about how clutter around you creates clutter in your brain?  It also lowers your vibration and I can prove it.  Clean off your desk.  There.  Doesn’t that feel better?  Told you so.  Want to feel even better?  Clean out the basement, the garage, the car, all the closets . . .
13. Act “as if.” I love this one.  Go through your situation in your mind and act as if the solution has already been achieved.  Ah.  Doesn’t that feel better?  Now focus on that feeling a little longer.  Longer.  Hold it.  Try to hold the feeling of that relief until the solution comes to you.  This little gem often works for me!
14. Get a massage. Need I say more?
15. Take an hour off. This concept is counter-intuitive for most of us because we rush around trying to get everything done only to drive home from work in a really bad mood.  I discovered a long time ago that if I take an hour off, especially one hour of solitude, I end up getting much more than an hour’s worth accomplished in return.  This is probably due to the fact that taking that hour raises your vibration and you can always get more accomplished from a joyful mindset than from a feeling of being overwhelmed.
16. Read something motivational. So why did you buy all those Brian Tracy CD’s and Steve Chandler books?  And don’t you have a “To Read” pile somewhere?  Oh, and please remember those web articles hanging out there in your favorites.  Steve Chandler is my favorite for a quick pick-me-up.  His book, 100 Ways To Motivate Yourself: Change Your Life Forever, always puts me higher on the emotional set-point scale.  If I’m in the car, anything by Brian Tracy will make sure I arrive at my destination with a smile on my face, ready to work.  And if I have the time and want to be challenged intellectually, I’ll head over to Steve Pavlina’s site to see what he’s been up to lately.  The important thing here is to know what works for you and keep it handy.  Then use it!
17. Light some aromatherapy candles. Preferably, you’ll only utilize this one when you are at home.  I find fragrances to have a huge impact on my mood.  Now, we’re not all the same in that a scent that works for me might be horrible to you and you might not respond to scent at all, but you won’t know until you try.  Experiment a little.  You’re worth it.
18. Open a window. The smell of fresh air works for just about everyone.  Getting stale air out and fresh air in is good feng shui, good housekeeping, and good vibrations.
19. Take a nap. If you’ve ever had little ones around, you know how they can get cranky in the afternoon if they haven’t had their nap.  Well, do we really ever grow up?  When I catch myself in a particularly cranky mood, I take a nap.  It helps.  Just 20-30 minutes and I awaken as a completely different person.  Well, not completely, but my vibration is much better and when nothing else works, it helps to do this first, then get up and listen to Al Jarreau.
20. Go shopping. I remember saying to a friend one day, “I’m depressed.  I need to buy something.”  She thought that was hilarious.  And I suppose it was.  But I was serious.  I caught on when I was a teenager that spending money somehow made me feel better.  It doesn’t have to be something expensive, and even if you live in a rural area you don’t have to get in the car – you can buy things online and get an immediate shift in your mood.  Isn’t technology wonderful?!  Part of it is just being good to yourself, and part of it is putting a little $ in circulation that will benefit someone else.  Now, you know what I’m talking about here.  Going online and running up all your credit cards is NOT going to raise your vibration to the point of joy.  But finding the perfect pair of spring sandals at Talbots.com – AWESOME!  I’ve come to know this as “retail therapy,” and I L-O-V-E it!!!
21. Create your own “vibrational lift” list. You know what works for you and I have to say that after creating this list, my vibration is at a pretty high level right now.  Just thinking about feeling good and ways to feel good will make you feel good.  Did you catch all that?  Great – now go feel good!

Until next time,
Live Joyfully!

Posted under Motivation

Yay!  It’s Monday!

I know, I know.  Too perky.  Way too perky.

But that’s me!  And hopefully by the end of this article, it’ll be you, too.  Why?  Because there’s nothing like feeling great on Monday morning.  So here are 3 quick ways to get your week off to a great start, right now.

1. Make a plan. What obligations do you have this week and to whom?  Having a well-laid-out calendar is not only rewarding, but brings peace and a more relaxed state of mind.  So list out all of your scheduled meetings, special events with family and friends, and any deadlines that are set for this week.  Add some time for yourself and remember that all-important flex time as well.  Don’t give this exercise longer than it needs.  Three to five minutes should be long enough to check your calendar and identify any necessary changes.
2. Envision a great week. Utilize the power of visualization to imagine your week turning out exactly the way you want.  What would that look like?  Picture it now and start making plans toward that end.  What would need to be added to your schedule?  What would you take away?  Again, 3 to 5 minutes is plenty of time to complete this exercise.
3. Count your blessings. Sincere appreciation for your life, your job, your family, your friends, and all the things good in your life will put you in a good mood for sure, and being in a great mood is definitely a good way to start the week.  So take 3 minutes to just jot down 30 things you appreciate.

If you’ve completed just one of these suggested exercises you’re on your way to a fabulous week.  Enjoy!

Until next time,
Live Joyfully!

Posted under Motivation

We all have them.  They sneak up on you almost without warning.  I say, “almost,” because there’s usually a little foreshadowing involved, like, not being able to find your keys when you’re already running late getting out the door for work.

Ah, the “bad day.”  I don’t need to define it for you, but what I can do is give you a few ways to cope when, in hindsight, you wonder if getting out of bed was the best decision.

1. Maintain your perspective.  I’ve somehow managed to trigger a response in my head that when something happens, this little voice says, “This too shall pass.”  It’s one of the advantages of being in your 40’s; you’ve lived enough life to know that this saying is very, very true.  So, in the grand scheme of things, this situation that has you upset right now, is it the end of the world?  No.  I can say with confidence, it’s not going to be the end of the world.  (Okay, if you’re a nuclear engineer and reading this, perhaps we need to talk, but the rest of you can relax.)
2. Take control. Do what you can, and accept that.  The problem might not get resolved today.  Do what you can, and if that’s nothing, it’s nothing.  Let’s face it, sometimes things are just simply out of our control.  Own up to your mistakes, if necessary, apologize, do what you can, but then move on.
3. Take a  nap.  Sometimes, this really will “break the spell.”  Thinking you got up on the wrong side of the bed?  Take a nap and get up on the other one - no kidding!  When there’s nothing you can do, changing your habits, or just doing something differently, will psyche you into believing that things are going to change.  And once you believe that . . .
4. Forget your troubles, come on get happy.  Dance, sing, read a motivational book, go to an amusement park, go shopping for something fun, (NOT grocery shopping), ride your bike, take a yoga class, or anything else that you enjoy doing that will take your mind off of everything that’s going wrong.  The advantage of this invokes the law of attraction.  The more you focus on what’s going wrong, the more things will go wrong.  So stop thinking about it.  But how do you stop thinking about the pink elephant? By imaging a green giraffe.
5. Laugh.  Shift your perspective by finding humor in the situation.  There is usually at least a little chuckle to be ascertained in even the most serious of mishaps and pivoting your perspective to see the humorous side is very healthy, emotionally, and physically.  If you can’t find humor in the situation, find humor somewhere.  Take a break and watch a comedy.  Sometimes we have trouble finding the better perspective because we’re too close to the problem.  Watching George Costanza finagle his way out of another tough spot might be just the push you need to see the light in your own situation.

Until next time,
Live Joyfully!

Posted under Motivation

Being an entrepreneur is very rewarding.  The challenge of pulling together a mastermind and creating something that benefits the world is life-giving in and of itself whether you accomplish your goal or not.

But sometimes, things happen that are out of your control and you just have to roll with the punches.  Having clearly defined values so that you can make split-second decisions in a crisis is an invaluable tool of extreme importance.

Last night, someone very dear to me called and did not sound good.  He has come down with the flu.  I dropped everything, including writing today’s article, (which was going to be lengthy - so you can thank him later), to take care of him.

I was able to do so and not worry about my commitment to my blog or my readers, because the health and welfare of my family and friends comes first.  Yes, this blog is important to me, but not as important as my personal relationships.

Some will be asking, “But what about your commitment to yourself?  Don’t you always say to take care of yourself first, because if you don’t, you won’t have anything to give anyone else?”

Yes.  I do say that and I still do.  So here’s how this works.  (I’m really grateful for the opportunity to explain this in this way.)

By dropping my schedule and running to his side, I was true to myself because I was true to my values.  I was, in that moment, completely selfish, because I chose my own needs, specifically, the need to be authentic, the desire to be authentic, over the need to keep someone else happy.  Taking care of those I care about is who I am, even more so than being a writer.

The best part is, I was able to come home, watch the series finale of Desperate Housewives, and then write this post, which was just as good as the one I had planned.  So staying true to myself led to an even greater lesson to share with all of you.

How was I able to make a decision so quickly?  Because I’ve identified my values and know them by heart.

If you’re not sure that you could make such a split-second decision and feel good about it, perhaps a review of your values is in order.  Determining Your Values is a post I wrote back in 2007 that will be very helpful to you whether you’re writing your first draft of your values, or simply need a review.  Or perhaps it’s time for you to update your values so that you can make better decisions in every moment.

In any case, be sure to commit your values to memory and make sure they represent you completely, so that making split-second decisions comes naturally and intuitively.

Until next time,
Live Joyfully!

Posted under Conscious Creation, Inspiration, Law of Attraction, Leadership, Motivation, Success

As I am gearing up for my new company, new website, and new products, I’m coming across a lot of interesting material.  Researching weight loss methods to pass on to my readers and followers of How I Lost 25 Pounds in One Month has been very interesting indeed!  I have a full-fledged update article for you coming soon, and will have a book available this fall, but in the meantime, I thought I’d share these 10 methodologies with you.  (Uh-hum, they might not make the final cut of the book, if that tells you anything.) This is just a fun post.

Keep in mind that the way any fad diet works is that it temporarily cuts down on the number of calories you’re consuming. They might use a lot of other marketing hype or even legitimate references to the glycemic index and metabolism, or complicate things by adding exercise and daily metabolic rate calculations, but in the end, it’s all about calories burned versus calories consumed.  (MUCH more on this in an up-coming post.)

Also remember that it’s not about achieving a certain number necessarily, it’s about being happy with who you are, inside and out.  Without further ado . . .

10 Ways to Lose 5 Pounds Fast

1. The Caveman Diet.  Also known as the Paleolithic diet, this gluten-free diet is high in fruits, meat, and nuts, and encourages you to eat locally grown foods.  Removing refined sugar from your diet alone would eliminate 5 pounds for most of us pretty quickly.
2. The Vision Diet.  No one wants to eat something that looks disgusting.  (This would be the fad diet for you, Mark!) The main theory behind this one is that certain colors motivate hunger, while blue diminishes it.  So they sell blue sunglasses that you wear while you’re eating.  You’ll notice, there is no link to said glasses here.  (Wink-wink, nod-nod.)
3. The Chewing Diet.  My dental industry followers will love this one!  Chew your food 32 times before swallowing and lose weight.  The theory is that when you chew your food more thoroughly your appetite shrinks.  Just thinking about it makes my appetite shrink - how ’bout you?
4. The Raw Food Diet.  This one reminds me of the Caveman diet.  Cathy Wong has a good matter-of-fact article about it.  Not only would you lose weight just in the time it takes you to figure out what you can eat, the foods you’d be eating are typically lower in calories as well.  So the forked approached. OOOHHH - bad pun - sorry!
5. The Baby Food Diet.  This one would work well for those of you who like bland food.  I have a friend who had success on this one.  It only works for a little while though because you’ll soon tire of opening all those little jars!  But the idea is you’ll retrain your body to proper portion control.
6. The Master Cleanse.  There are several of these diets around that involve several days of drinking a liquid concoction and not eating solid food for about a week.  You have to be careful about calories, still, but it does work.
7. The Peanut-Butter Diet.  This one worked for me, even when I didn’t need it.  Several years ago I was in lingual orthodontic therapy and could eat nothing but peanut-butter.  I got down to a Size 0.  Later, when I saw the book in a bookstore, I said, “Well I know that diet works.”  The diet is actually a pretty good one and nutritionally sound, just not popular anymore.  But hey, the book is only a buck on Amazon and wouldn’t it be fun to drop a few pounds that way?
8. The Grapefruit Diet.  Eating half a grapefruit before every meal will help you eat less of the meal, or so they say, but the fine print indicates that the meal can only be around 800 calories.  There are several theories around why this works.  My mother tried it and I believe she did lose a few quick pounds, but it’s not sustainable.  Not for most people, anyway.  If you have GI problems or take Nexium or Prilosec, skip this one.
9. The Atkins Diet.  I still like (and use) this one for quick, short-term, fast weight loss.  Again, the way it works is by cutting back on your calories.  Protein packs fewer calories per gram of food eaten than fat or carbohydrates, so you can eat a reasonable amount, consumer fewer calories, and lose weight pretty quickly without feeling hungry.  This one is probably my favorite on this list.
10. The Morning Banana Diet.  On this diet, you are to eat a banana for breakfast with a glass of room-temperature water to boost metabolism, and then eat a normal lunch and dinner.  No snacks or desserts.  That’s it.  Pretty simple.  My problem is, I always have two brown bananas on my kitchen counter and no time to make banana bread!

I’d love to hear from you if you have another method to lose 5 pounds quickly, or if you’ve had success on one of these.  (But - and I say this with complete and total L-O-V-E- please don’t email me just to complain or ask a banal question - and if you think it might be banal, it is!)  To comment on this post, click the title and scroll to the bottom.

Until next time,
Live Joyfully!

UPDATE 8/7/2012 - The most common question I’m now getting is, “Are there any other systems out there that really work?  I don’t necessarily want to count calories.”  So after much research, I’ve found a site that reviews weight loss products and keeps us all updated.  I’ve signed on with them as an affiliate - that’s how much I believe in what they do.  Check them out and let me know what you think!

Posted under Motivation

You are what you do.  Did you know that?

Some people don’t like to hear that.  Some will argue, saying, “I am so much more than what I do!”  Really?  How so?

The way I see it, a person who spends time teaching is a teacher.  One who spends time writing is a writer.  One who spends time complaining is a complainer.  (Keeping it nice.)  And one who spends time restoring art, is an art restorer.  (Yes, Anne, this one’s for you!)

We all have struggles and messes and issues and mouths waiting to be fed and bosses who suck and spouses who whine and okay, you get the drift.

But within each and every day, the one thing we have control over, for the most part, is what we choose to do with our time.  Where do you put your focus?  Tell me what you focus on, and I’ll tell you who you are. There are 1,440 minutes in every day.  That means that there are 1,440 decision points in every day. One thousand, four hundred and forty opportunities to be who you want to be.

Yes, planning and preparation are important, as are thinking and reflecting.  But action is the critical, rate-limiting step for reaching your full potential.  Those of you who have been following my blog for several years know that I am an advocate of personal strategic planning.  Well, maybe it’s time for a post about personal strategic execution.  Ah.  Yes.  That sounds nice, doesn’t it?

So I’m off to write another blog post because, well, I’m a blogger.  That’s what I do, and I L-O-V-E it!  Granted, it’s only one thing that I do, but that’s another post.  Stay tuned . . .

Until next time,
Live Joyfully!

Posted under Motivation

We all have a need to be creative at times, but often feel stuck when we’re called upon or put on the spot. Here are some exercises that will be fun for you and either get or keep your creative juices flowing. Enjoy!

1. Sit by the pool. No problem, right?! (I told you these were going to be fun.) Seriously though, this one serves a double-whammy in that there is something about being near a body of water that gets our creative juices flowing. Besides that, staring up at the white, fluffy clouds and imagining shapes, faces, and messages will inspire your creative side as well.
2. Get in the pool.  Exercise, even light exercise, is good for the creative mind.  I have 2 theories on the reasoning behind this.  One, just a slight increase in endorphins will spark a creative burst, plus getting in motion will get you active and that also causes creative jolts.
3. Practice pretending.  You did this as a child.  Do it again.  Pretending, imagining, practicing, planning, whatever you want to call it, is creativity.  Start with a small thought, playing pretend about anything, and allow that energy to propel you into something greater.
4. Read fiction.  Another way to call in the energy of creativity is to get in touch with someone else’s.  The easiest way to do that (and least intrusive) is to pick up a book.  Fiction is best because it requires creativity and imagination just to follow along.  The energy used by the writer really does come across the pages (yes - even digital) and may be just the inspiration you need.
5. Play a game.  Finding clever ways to beat your opponent will boost your creative powers.  Try it!  If you’d like to play Words with Friends or Dice with Buddies, my usernames are Red diva 10 and RedDiva10 respectively.
6. People watch.  Sit in a crowded area, like the mall, and make up stories about the people walking by.  Where do they work?  Why are they here? What are they shopping for?
7. Create a persona.  Everyone loves my “Giada at the grocery store” story!  This is also one of my favorites.  It’s just like playing pretend as a child, but as an adult, and in front of other people, but they don’t know it.  Awesome!  Read the article I’ve linked if you’re not familiar with what I’m talking about and it will fill you in.
8. Create worlds.  On a long drive or before bed, challenge your creative brain by trying to imagine a faraway world.  Who lives there?  What do they look like?  What is the atmosphere like?  What’s different?  Even better, make it a game with someone else.
9. Re-write your journal entry.  I’ve been teaching about the benefits of keeping a journal for several years now.  It is still, IMO, the best way to motivate yourself, and you know how healing it can be as well.  Just getting things out of your head and down on paper can be very therapeutic. Take it one step further by re-writing an episode from your life with a different ending.  So instead of telling the story the way it played out, tell the story the way you wish it had turned out.  Try it.  It’s powerful!
10. Star gaze.  I started by the pool, so it’s only fitting that I finish with a night-time analogy, right?  our ancestors made up stories about the stars.  It is our nature to be creative.  So be it!

Until next time,
Live Joyfully!

Posted under Motivation

I decided to go for a bike ride this morning; haven’t been on a bike in about 12 years; haven’t owned a bike in  about 20 years.  I’ve been looking for ways to take advantage of my new home’s beautiful surroundings and am finding new ways to do so every day.

Living only a few minutes from the Loveland Bike Trail, I decided to rent a bike.  I’ve been planning to do this for some time, even bought the pants last year and then didn’t get to go - (long story for another post - or not. !)  But for some reason, I felt pulled in that direction this morning.  I just woke up, saw how beautiful the day was going to be, felt grateful to be alive, and wanted to celebrate it in some way.  While I was in the shower, the inspiration struck me - go rent a bike and cruise the bike trail.

No matter how many times this happens to me, I’m still amazed by it every time - whenever I follow my intuition, I’m greatly rewarded.  I was slightly hesitant to indulge my sudden urge this morning thinking that I should really stay in my office and get started on my new company.  But the voice kept saying, “Oh - just go.  Trust me!”  So I did, and even though I spent only one hour on the trail, it was the perfect amount of time to get the inspiration for this post, and a very valuable life lesson.

After getting signed up and giving them my credit card, I walked the bike to my car to ditch my purse.  Then, I mounted the bright pink Electra Townie and took off!

Well, sort of.

Let me explain.

Now, remember, it has been a while since I’ve ridden a bike.  The trail is completely flat and you can park right next to it in Historic Loveland.  (Which I did.)  It was a 7-speed bike set at level 7.  Which was fine - I wanted a workout.  While it is true that you never forget how to ride a bike, there was one major aspect that I didn’t remember, and that was the effort required to get yourself going.  So even though I was in the perfect spot to take off, the resistance of the setting and my (apparent) laziness caused me to struggle a little taking off.

Not to worry.  I adjusted quickly and was on my way in no time, but from where I started there was a stop sign very soon to allow for a highway crossing.  “No problem,” I thought.  “I have breaks.”  Yes, yes I did have breaks.  Only problem was, I had to get started again.  And, of course, there were nice people driving on that road who very graciously stopped for me, both ways, to allow me to cross, so I had an audience this time.  Wonderful!

Again, not to worry.  I probably looked a little silly, but I made it through and continued to get stronger with each stop and start.

As I reflected on the experience while riding, I had a major epiphany: There are many instances where life is like riding a bike.  It takes a lot of momentum to get going, but once you get going, you move faster and faster, and feel better and better.  So it’s worth that extra push in the beginning.

The first example of this that came to mind while I was on the trail was how much effort it took in the beginning to create a new life for myself, but then once I made the effort, my life got better and better until I was soaring.

Starting any project is usually that way as well - getting started is the hardest part, but once you’re moving, you gain momentum.  But you have to push yourself to get started.

A positive attitude is often that way as well, isn’t it?  It takes a little effort to make yourself pivot from a negative thought to a positive thought, but once you start thinking that way, you’ll experience an entire paradigm shift about whatever the subject is.

So I invite you today to learn from my biking lesson.  What is it in your life that you need to put a little extra effort in to in order to get going?

Until next time,
Live Joyfully!

My view as I turned around to head back to the rental station:

Posted under Motivation

With authenticity as my focus for this year, I’ll be reading (and writing) a lot about this subject.  Today I’d like to share with you some recent reflections and epiphanies on this subject.

Authenticity from a spiritual perspective means being true to oneself.  No facades.  How often do we say something or behave in a disingenuous manner in order to please someone else, and what toll does that take on our psyche?

How you react, both consciously and sub-consciously, to everything that happens to you and around you affects your self-esteem in some way. Your perception of each stimulus either increases your self-esteem or lowers it.  Therefore, the defense and development of your self-esteem becomes the key to high performance, happiness, and ultimate success.  This is why it is so important to maintain authenticity in your daily interactions.  Every time I make myself be true to myself, my self-esteem soars.  Let me explain.

While many things affect your self-image, one of the most important aspects is the difference between your current self-image, the way you see yourself in the moment, and your self-ideal, the way you would ideally like to be either right now, or sometime in the future.

Whenever you feel your current performance and behavior is consistent with the person that you would like to be, you’re being authentic, and your self-esteem goes up. You feel happier and more exhilarated, you have more energy and enthusiasm, and you are more positive and personable with others. You’re in a good mood.

On the other hand, when your current performance or behavior is inconsistent with the person you would like to be, your self-esteem goes down. You feel anxious and unhappy. You feel self-conscious and embarrassed. You feel frustrated and angry. You feel depressed and in a bad mood.  (Not your authentic self.)

So how do you increase your self-esteem and create a self-image that will propel you forward instead of holding you back?  How do you seize those moments of authenticity and make them play out the way you want?

1. First, develop a clear picture of the person you want to become. The greater clarity you have with regard to your self-ideal – the person you would most like to be – the easier it is for you to tailor your performance and behavior to be consistent with that kind of person. Sometimes it is helpful to read about someone whose personality you admire, and try to adapt his or her behaviors. For example, Shelly Branch and Sue Callaway have written a great book titled, What Would Jackie Do? This book details some of the characteristics of Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy Onassis. Men tend to like anything by or about Winston Churchill, like Never Give In!
2. Second, visualize yourself behaving in the manner you desire. We all have some recurring situation that gets the best of us. We never know how to react until it’s too late and the opportunity has passed. However, people with a well-developed self-image rarely have this problem. They have practiced, (I’m not kidding,) saying or doing that which they desire until the opportunity presented itself to behave in a certain way. It’s just like an actor preparing his or her lines until the night comes to perform. Every time you do or say anything that is consistent with the person you want to be, your self-esteem goes up. When your self-esteem goes up, your self-image begins to change. You feel positive and powerful. You feel capable of doing more and better things in that area and in other areas of your life. You become the person you want to be because you are authentic.
3. Third, realize that “reacting” to a situation doesn’t always mean you have to say something. Remember earlier when I said that how you react, both consciously and sub-consciously, to everything that happens to you and around you affects your self-esteem in some way. Sometimes, it’s best to just let the other person say what they want, then silently say to yourself, “That’s not true. I’m a very smart person. I’m organized and thorough. This was just a minor mishap that will never happen again.” As long as your inner mind can influence your self-image, (and it can), there is really no need to start confronting every issue.  Pick your battles. Doing so will give you an amazing sense of control.
4. Fourth, engage in positive self-talk. Start saying nice things to yourself. In his book, Million Dollar Habits,Brian Tracy says one of the ways he increased his self-esteem years ago was by repeating to himself 10 to 50 times a day, “I like myself!” The powerful message behind this phrase is that even when you mess up, and we all do, you can still like yourself. Or at least you should, because that what self-esteem is – liking yourself no matter what.  Authenticity is liking yourself enough to be yourself - no matter what.
5. Fifth, catch yourself being authentic.  This will reinforce the behavior while increasing your self-image at the same time.  (I love 2 for 1 deals!)  When you say No to a new project or speak your mind (in a loving way, of course) take a moment to pat yourself on the back.  Acknowledge the fact that you can be true to yourself and the world will go on.  It’s very freeing!

Everyone, even the most successful person, faces authenticity challenges every day. What matters is how you react to them. Don’t let anything or anyone keep you from attaining the success you deserve. Defend and develop your self-esteem.  Be authentic!

Until next time,
Live Joyfully!

Posted under Motivation